Whether you are a generally positive person or not, it can be difficult to stay positive despite the chaos at home.
As a mom, life at home can be chaotic even when nothing terrible is happing. Between work, home responsibilities, raising tiny humans, sports activities, world affairs, and the like, the demands on your time and person can be many. All of these factors can take a toll on even the most experienced positive thinker.
Fret no more, I’ve got a game plan for you to follow when you feel your positivity waning!
Let’s use a chaotic morning as an example.
When you are in the midst of chaos, it can be difficult to see anything correctly. The first step to regaining composure is to walk away from it all for a moment. Take a few deep breaths to help center your mind.
Identify & Accept
Next, you need to identify what in that situation is causing you to think or feel negatively.
For example, you’re in the middle of getting you and your kids ready for the day, but all of your clothes feel disgusting, and you want to sit down and cry (or scream, yell, whatever verb fits). Could it be that you’re focusing on negative self-talk and that started a domino of other feelings? You woke up late, your eyes are baggy, and you’re just not feeling confident?
Accept that the kids are being just that, kids. Get yourself squared away, and then you can deal with them.
Accept the fact that you woke up late. You are imperfect, and life happens.
Accept the fact that you are a little tired. It’s going to happen…a lot! Give yourself the grace you’d want others to give you.
Ok, now what??
Reframe & Refocus
Now, reframe that situation in your mind and flip it onto the positive side. Even if you don’t quite believe it, tell yourself that you do. What you put out, you’ll get exactly that back.
“It’s ok that I woke up late. I’m still a fierce ass-kicking woman!”
“It’s ok that I look a little tired. I will put some depuffing eye cream on while I take a sip of this glorious coffee, knowing it will all be ok.”
“My clothes are my art palette, and all of them are amazing choices. Whatever I put on is going to look great!”
Take Back Control
Now that your mind is refocused, you can take back control of the chaos.
Kids still running around screaming and not getting dressed for school? Calmly set your expectations for them.
“We’ve got 15 minutes before we leave. I need you to put your pants, socks, and shoes on as quickly as you can, please. I’ll come back in 5 minutes to check on your progress.”
Throw your clothes on and then check in on their progress. Still not done? No problem, you’re dressed now, so you can help them with the rest.
Set a Plan for Next Time
When you have a moment later that day, set up a plan to alleviate the stress you experienced in that chaotic situation (earlier that morning in this example). By having a mental plan, you can succeed at staying positive despite the chaos at home.
Have your kids pick out their clothes the night before and lay them out. You do the same!
Set your coffee pot on a timer so it starts without you the next morning and is ready to go. My Keurig automatically turns on at 6:30 a.m. so that all I have to do is pop a pod in there and push “brew.”
Set your alarm(s) a few minutes earlier to give yourself more of a cushion for inevitable chaos.
Do a couple of quick pushups, high knees, or stretches after waking up to get your blood and brain pumping.
Whatever works for you based on the situation, you get the idea.
As a review, to succeed at staying positive despite the chaos, remember to:
- Walk Away
- Identify & Accept
- Reframe & Refocus
- Take Back Control
- Set a Plan for Next Time.
Still struggling and feeling overwhelmed in general? Read my other post on 5 simple tips to help you when you are feeling overwhelmed.
Have other tips that have helped you during chaotic moments at home? Please share in the comments below, I’d love to hear them!